Yes, No or Maybe

17 Jan 2018

How can 3 words hold so much significance?


We often underestimate the power of these words and their meaning. If life needed a steering wheel, then these words are it.


How and when you use these words will have a direct impact on how your life unfolds. It’s also a reflection of:


Your confidence


Your convictions


Your authenticity 


Your clarity of purpose


Your values


Your integrity 


Your level of certainty


Context is also important, so knowing how and when to use them is an art. We sometimes say no, when we should have said yes and vice versa.


So let’s examine these a little bit closer.


‘Yes’ is essentially an invitation. You’ve made the conscious decision (or choice) to invite something or someone into your life, so be ready and willing to live with it. 


Yes, is also associated with commitment, so in that sense, people fear it and probably use it less often than they should.


'No’, is a boundary. Getting clear on your boundaries will help you save your time and attention for the things that really matter. 


My experience suggests that people generally have a problem saying 'no', when they probably should; and often say 'no', when they probably should've said yes! 


No, also means maintaining the status quo, nothing different, no commitments, it's safe, it's comfortable, there's nothing to fear - so it's much easier to commit too. 


‘Maybe’ on the other hand is essentially a 'holding' word. It reflects ambiguity, uncertainty, fear or a lack of purpose.


It’s the safe zone you put yourself in when you’re too afraid to say yes or no. 


Unlike ‘yes’ and ‘no’; ‘maybe’ doesn’t give you a sense of resolution, it keeps things lingering. You’re essentially unable to settle or move forward if you find yourself in the 'maybe zone' too often.


So how do you know you’re making the right choice? Well you don’t, what is the right choice anyway? 


But only by making them will you get better. It’s through experience that you learn and grow. 


Getting clear on your priorities will certainly help. 


Keep in mind that ‘indecision’ is also a decision; or 'not choosing' is also a 'choice'


So next time you find yourself using any of these words, consider it a trigger and ask yourself why you used it at that particular point in time and what the likely outcome might be?!


Make sure you say it like you mean it, own it and be willing to follow through. 


You’ll feel empowered and begin to realise that you have much more influence than you may have ever realised.

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